The (Instagram) Stress is Real: How to Deal With Social Media Pressure When Planning Your Wedding

Photo by Elizabeth Messina
Published on on May 29, 2016 by Jillian Kramer

While we often use it for inspiration to create a killer party, “social media, and especially Instagram, has become an added stress for couples planning their weddings,” says Jaclyn Fisher, owner of Two Little Birds Planning in Philadelphia. “Couples feel more pressure to create Instagram-worthy weddings like the ones they see online.” But you can fight social media stress and still create a gorgeous wedding with these expert tips.

Keep it real.
Says Fisher, “When looking at weddings on Instagram, remember that they often aren’t real or budgeted for reality.” Rather, she says, much of what you see on this social site comes from styled shoots. “So use them as inspiration, not as something you’re trying to copy or recreate,” Fisher suggests. “For example, you may see a couple beautifully posed on an antique sofa set on the edge of a cliff. You many not have a cliff side venue, but you can still set up a lounge with vintage furniture, which can double as a photo backdrop. It’s about taking inspiration from these photo shoots and applying them to your wedding in your own unique way.”

Put it into perspective.
You’re probably not having a wedding to keep up with the Joneses you don’t know. So, says Aviva Samuels, owner of Kiss the Planner in Palm Beach, Florida, “remind yourself of the reasons that you are having this wedding. Is it to impress your friends and family, or to be able to celebrate finding your soul mate for life? If you can stay focused on the joy that you are feeling, rather than getting caught up in what others are thinking or going to say, you won’t have to succumb to the pressure of having the perfect wedding with every perfect detail. Putting it into perspective is really helpful when it comes to having the perfect day.”

Focus on your wedding, not someone else’s.
So you love that someone else served gourmet sliders as a late-night snack. But you can love it, says Fisher, without having to recreate it. “Prioritize a few thoughtful and genuine details, instead of overdoing it with details that don’t make sense to you as a couple,” she suggests. “For example, you don’t need to have a food truck because you’ve seen them on Instagram weddings and want to be on trend. But if you had your first date at a food truck or it’s where you two go for lunch every Saturday, it makes sense to incorporate it into your wedding day.”

Trust your decisions.
Your Instagram feed is filled-to-the-brim with wedding gorgeousness. And, says Fisher, “it’s easy to second-guess everything when you’re bombarded with an endless supply beautiful weddings and cool details on Instagram. But trust that you made the right choice the first time and don’t let these images sway your vision or decisions.”

Hire a professional.
Finally, if you do truly won’t be happy unless you have an Instagram-worthy wedding, then “hire a professional to alleviate some of the stress that goes along with all the details,” suggests Samuels. “Even if you have a lots of creative ideas, you might not have the skills or the time to implement those ideas and you wouldn’t want the added pressure to add to your stress. A planner can alleviate a lot of the headaches that comes with logistical challenges and a designer can alleviate the pressure you might feel when trying to design your wedding on your own.”

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